In the way

A blessing of pregnancy that I haven't commented much on, with good reason, is certainly due its mention at this point. The reason it hasn't come up until now is that the farther along you get, the more noticeable it becomes. I am talking about the baby bump, aka the enormous blob sticking out front. Many pregnant women lovingly refer to this as a bump, I call it a blob or my giant belly, but never a bump. At least not anymore.
It is very odd having something like this grow so quickly off the front of your torso. At first it is just the little things, like your pants getting tight, not buttoning, can't see the old toes anymore, and other things like that. Then it progresses into new territory.
As an example, one of the first things you realize is that your balance is completely off. I stumbled backwards on a flat surface one day for no reason. You find yourself placing your hand on your back or under that "bump"(if that is what you want to call it), to take a little stress off of the rest of your body. You skin begins to tighten and itch and the stretch marks come out to say hello. A lot of women, I think especially young girls who get this, find it to be very upsetting. I am not really worried since I will not be in any bikini contests in the future and likely won't be modeling underwear. For me, they came at the very bottom and top of my belly. A lot of women get these around their belly button. Mine aren't showing there yet, but that doesn't mean they won't. All I can say is that they itch like you have some sort of filthy disease and the ones up top are a little disturbing because I didn't really expect any around my rib cage.
If you get past them with no problem, there is still more fun around the corner. One of the great experiences is when you realize just how hard it is getting to breathe or eat because of all that baby stuffed up in your ribs. Sitting up has never been so hard since I was in 4th grade gym class being timed. Not being able to bend at the waist and hip area makes it tough to do those little things you take for granted like getting out of bed to pee in the middle of the night or picking up laundry from the floor.
These were all things I sort of anticipated, though, so I know it is just a matter of toughing it out for a few more weeks and I will be able to breathe and sit up again.
What is getting on my nerves is the things I never thought of. At least twice now, I have slammed the car door into my belly when I tried shutting it. This is pretty unpleasant and results in a nasty little bruise. Part of the problem is that I have two cars that I drive regularly, and both are pretty lousy for a pregnant woman to get in and out of. Normally, I hop right in and Mr. W is the one complaining. Not anymore. I can either crawl into my Celica or hoist my giant self into my Wrangler. Actually, the Wrangler isn't so bad to get in and out of, the challenge there is getting the top on. When it starts raining suddenly, I have to climb onto the foot rails and hold on for dear life to get the front lip of the top tucked in. The first time I realized this was a problem was after doing so, when I was driving on the highway and noticed it was coming loose. I am here to tell you, it is a very scary feeling knowing that the roof of your car is peeling off while you are doing 65. That was a few months ago, and it is now Mr. W's job to make sure that is tucked in safely when I put it up, since he can still reach.
I also have knocked over more than one cup of coffee while leaning over my desk. This is a double insult because I then have to try waddling around quickly to find a way to clean it all up. Fitting into a booth at a restaurant is no longer easy. I never know when my belly is going to be smashed up against the table, which is not only humiliating, it is also pretty uncomfortable when you are trying to eat.
Fitting through a tight space has never been tougher. Your first instinct is to always turn sideways. At some point, I have realized that this is no longer a good idea and that I have a better chance of fitting with my arms up over my head and my hips angled just a little. I realized this when I nearly ended up pinned between a wall and a woman at a buffet line in a church basement. She was way too busy with her plate to make an effort to shrink herself.
Yep...a lot of people call this thing a bump.
A speed bump, maybe. One that keeps me from doing anything quickly or without an extra step involved.