...a big thank you.
I think I should be the first one to document that the baby already owes me and it isn't even out of the womb. I am not saying that because of back pain or morning sickness or any of those fine pregnancy treats. No, my baby owes me because I am already protecting it from it's father.
One might wonder what kind of man this is, that I have to protect my unborn child from? What has he done? How can he be so horrid? Did you move into a safe house?
No, you see, Mr. W has some German blood in his lineage and actually thought that there might be a mild possibility that we would give this child a German name. Excuse me a moment....BWHAHAHAHAHAHA....no.
I bought a book of "cool baby names" and it had a section for international names. He wanted to see which German names were listed and I promptly informed him that there was no "German" section because German names are hideous.
So you're welcome, baby. Thank your mommy that you won't grow up being Adolf, Jarvis, Roberta, Brunhilde, Dagmar or Erhard. Mommy would never call you Freida, Gunther, Hildebrand, or Inga. She hears nothing but years of taunting and abuse in Manfred, Olaf, Rudolf, and Ursula.
She reminded Daddy that while Mommy is not dainty, Daddy is huge, and you could, quite possibly, be a girl. There is no reason to start you out in life with a fat kid name.
So high five me, Baby W, because Mommy made her point, and Daddy dropped the subject for the last time.
Keep this favor in mind when you start asking me to do your school projects the day before they are due.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment