Ultrasounds

So I had no idea before all this that there would be a procedure called an internal ultrasound. It has a few other names, but I will leave it at internal.
Talk about invasive. It is bad enough getting a pap, but when I saw the wand they used for these things, well...the Dr. had described it as a candle. Let's just say that I was expecting a taper candle. What I encountered in the ultrasound room was more of a pillar candle.
Had this not been the key to confirming that I was growing a human, I would have probably walked out the door. I made it through, but lost a bit of my dignity. Men should be very glad they have not designed a means to use this tool for prostate checks.
I know I discussed a little about Mr. W not being able to see the baby in the pictures, but the ultrasound is a very unique experience for a pregnant woman. Let me explain.
Because the baby is not completely visible in all the pictures, this can lead to very long bits of time spent studying the shadows on the printouts for a mother to be.
Any black spot must be taken in good faith as being a shadow. Is the right side of baby's face missing? Why do the legs look like a pretzel? Is this normal?
Any question from the ultrasound tech becomes loaded.
"Did you have an appointment with the Dr. today?"(no, why, is something wrong?)
What makes it particularly worse is, clearly, this is not like taking a video of your cat on your cell phone. The resolution is of a much lower quality, everything is a spooky black and grey, and there are infinite shadows. It's hard enough to see your baby in that alien blob that they point out to you, but every little shadow covers a hidden baby part.
Still, there is a peace of mind in seeing the little fish-like baby bouncing around in your belly. It's those weeks in between the ultrasounds that you find yourself looking at the photos and questioning them, deeply.
I would also like to add that the new 3d and 4d ultrasounds are pretty eerie, in my opinion. I prefer looking at my baby in a sort of x-ray fashion as opposed to pictures that remind me of a very creepy orange glob of partially molded clay.
Why people are paying hundreds to document their child in this way is hard for me to understand. Hopefully, Baby W will grow up and not be angry that mommy didn't need more 3d pictures of Baby that seem to say "Boo!, I'm your baby!!".(or find funny globs and bumps on to obsess over )